Monday, February 4, 2008

Always Be On The Lookout For Greatness

What’s that saying “Dance like no one is watching”? Yeah, don’t do that. Especially if you are in a public setting and out of touch with current social norms. I witnessed this beauty at my daughter’s Halloween elementary school parade. Let me paint the picture for you- the subject was an awkward skinny woman with elastic waistband pants pulled way up with shirt tucked in. Fortunately, this woman chose her coming out party while I was present. As the parade droned on with boom box blaring, she proceeded to entertain in the middle of the cement schoolyard with what can only be described as an interpretive dance of some bygone era. The convulsive movements and stutter step hopping were only interrupted by moments of clarity where she would act out the words to the song that was playing. Like when Ghostbusters was playing and she started shaking her head no and wagging her finger to “I ain’t afraid of no ghost”. The rest of the parents were watching the kids and nobody seemed to notice this school administrator letting loose in her own world. But I did, and I only wish I brought the video camera. Outstanding.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

The Classics Never Fail to Deliver

I’m walking my kids to the park in a stroller and as I’m stopping to cross the street in the middle of the block this car stops and I give him the “go ahead” wave. He then gives the “no, you go ahead wave” and then we go back and forth a few more times until he gets a perturbed look on his face and makes a left into his driveway. WTF, lighten up Francis. As I go on my way and cross the street I hear a crunching sound and turn around. It’s the old classic, “Forgot I had my bicycle up on the roof rack and drove into my garage maneuver”. A trifecta of hilarity, bent the bike, dented the roof of the car and damaged the garage. You, my friend, just made my day. It’s funny how when this happens to you it is not funny at all, but when it happens to someone else it is quite comical.

Friday, January 18, 2008

When Head Trauma Makes You Spit Your Food Out

No, the two are not related, that is, the person receiving the head trauma and the person spitting out his food (me). I recently found myself reading a past issue of Forbes magazine and eating lunch in the waiting area while getting my brakes done. With the title of the series of articles called “The Adventurer- Life on the Edge” you would think the writer would be somewhat athletic and/or coordinated. Apparently, he goes and interviews athletes and adveturists and becomes a participant in their activity to give the reader a kind of insight as to what it’s like to do what they do. Well, the ClueLacking author goes to interview Olympic figure skater Sasha Cohen and tries to learn how to skate. He proceeds to tell us that he buys new expensive skates and declines wearing a helmet because it may throw his balance off. He sets us up with the knowledge that he has climbed the Matterhorn with crampons and trekked the South Pole in skis but has never been on skates. He starts out and is trying a slow simple spin, tries it once, twice and then his story reads “On the third attempt I decided to swing a little harder. When I came to, I was in an ambulance, strapped to a board.” That was the point when food came spontaneously flying out of my mouth. So let's see, within 2 minutes of touching the rink he is face down and unconscious on the ice with arms down by his side? Now that's quite an adventure. You really have to check out the video to appreciate it here, fast forward to 3:50. Ouch, it looks/sounds painful, but it’s OK you can go ahead and watch, just don’t have anything in your mouth.

The full article in Forbes is here.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

They Just Don't Have A Clue

With this blog I want to attempt to capture what are some of the funnier moments in life, specifically when someone is funny but doesn’t know it. They are not trying to be funny and they are not in on the joke, but I find these people/moments to be some of the most genius bits of comedy.

I will share my observations when I encounter these incidents, but I really am looking for contributions from you, your stories, photos or video clips so that we can all enjoy these precious moments together. The intent is not mean spirited, but it is what it is… and that is damn funny.